Begin with a Well-Pressed Cloth

The cloth does more work than anything else on the table. A freshly pressed white or cream linen cloth lifts even everyday china into something that feels like an occasion, and it takes barely half an hour to achieve properly. Wash the cloth well ahead, then iron it whilst still faintly damp so the steam does most of the pressing for you. Work along the length, then fold it in half and press the crease sharply, so the fold falls straight down the centre of the table. A light spray starch keeps the drape crisp without stiffening it.

Underneath, a felt or brushed-cotton protector stops heat marking the wood and holds the cloth steady when plates are moved. If you are using a bare wooden table, treat it first with a good beeswax polish and buff it with a soft cloth until it gleams rather than shines.

Cutlery, China and the Sensible Order of Plates

Set each place with the cutlery in the order it will be used, working inwards. A small knife and cake fork to the right of the setting, a side plate to the left, with a pressed napkin either on the plate or folded beside the forks. Teaspoons belong on the saucer with the handle at four o'clock, or laid neatly above the plate if you are using a stand.

If you are serving from a tiered stand, the accepted order runs from the bottom upwards:

• Bottom tier: finger sandwiches, crusts removed, cut no more than two bites wide
• Middle tier: scones with jam and clotted cream
• Top tier: small cakes, shortbread and tartlets

Eaten in that order, the palate moves from savoury to sweet and the tea stays interesting throughout. Stack your spare plates near the buffet in the same sequence, so guests take a plate for sandwiches, then return for a clean one before the cakes. Keep the piles shallow and the china warm rather than chilled.

Getting the Tea Itself Right

Warm the pot first by swilling it with boiling water, then empty it. For loose leaf, allow one teaspoon per person and one for the pot. Let the kettle come off the boil just as it stops rolling — water at a furious boil scalds black blends and makes green or white teas bitter. Brew an Assam or English Breakfast for three to four minutes, then either lift the leaves out or pour through a strainer.

Serve milk in a small jug rather than adding it yourself, and offer sugar lumps with a pair of tongs. A second pot of plain hot water is quietly useful for topping up, and it saves you leaving the table mid-conversation. If you have a favourite blend, say so — guests always enjoy being told what they are drinking.

Small Posies and Quiet Finishing Touches

Little posies in jam jars or small glass tumblers do more for a tea table than an enormous central arrangement. Keep them low so nobody has to peer around them, and choose flowers with almost no scent — lilies and hyacinths will fight the tea and win. A few stems of rosemary, mint or feverfew from the garden look charming and cost nothing. Trim the stems at an angle, change the water on the morning, and add one posy at each end of the table rather than one in the middle.

Fill in the gaps with small, useful things: a butter dish at room temperature, a clean spoon resting in the jam, a folded cloth within reach for spills.

What to Bake, and When

Home baking is the heart of it, and timing matters more than variety. Bake scones on the morning itself — they are at their best within two or three hours of coming out of the oven, and there is nothing sadder than a scone from yesterday. Cool cakes completely before icing, or the glaze will slide straight off.

• Make ahead: shortbread, flapjacks and fruit cakes keep beautifully in an airtight tin for days
• Make on the day: scones, fairy cakes and a Victoria sponge
• Assemble at the last moment: sandwiches, and the cream whipped for the sponge

Keep everything small. A tea table is a procession of little things rather than a feast, and guests should feel able to try one of everything without guilt.

On the Day Itself

Lay the table an hour before your guests arrive, then leave it alone. Put the kettle on as the first car pulls up, not before, and warm the cups with hot water and dry them so the first pour stays hot to the last drop. Keep the tiered stand comfortably filled rather than piled high, and top it up quietly between courses.

Turn the music down, sit down with your guests, and let someone else do the fetching for once. A tea table is not a test — it is simply a way of saying that you thought about them before they came. Get the cloth pressed, the order of plates sensible, and the tea hot, and the rest will look after itself.